Sunday, June 16, 2013

Viva Las Vegas: What One Week in "Sin City" Has Taught Me

Vegas, Vegas, Vegas.

I've got nothing against the place, except that it's not the most friendly if you're wandering around by yourself, and that most people are drunk. There are drunks every hour of every day, and Lady Luck doesn't like it when I play anything but blackjack.  VIP lists can be a mile long and you get shunted if you're alone.

At the same time... I'm having a blast. I know how to walk around people (thank you New York), I love the fact that I can choose to do what I want (within legal limits), and the sight of open containers with public drinking, while technically not legal, is almost heart-warming (it reminds me of Belgium).

I get to do the Freemont Street Experience (even though I felt my heart stop when I ate the deep-fried Oreo).  At the same time, I decide that I don't really want to go zip lining above people's heads.  I somehow get to go to an Offspring concert.  I even get my mother to call the cops and report me missing (NOTE: the cell phone reception is horrible inside of casinos. You better make sure that you call well outside the walls, otherwise, someone might think you have been kidnapped)!

I walk up and down the Strip. I get shanghai-ed by a sales man, eat at a Rainforest Cafe for the first time ever, and play test audience for a new television show.  I visit a tourist attraction featuring the Mob and play along, even though I have no idea what to expect (ultimately I get made into the family!). I even have an alcoholic popsicle.

My experience did NOT turn into anything remotely from the Hangover franchise.  But... In the end, I would like to leave you with this list of amusing, entertaining and bizarre comments from Las Vegas:

1. "You got that Asian persuasion."
2. "Your hands look like they can win some money." (insert pause) "Want a job?"
3. "Girl, it's hot out here, but you just made it hotter."
4. "Oooohhhh, so that's what single and willing to mingle means."
5. "Just so you know, I got laid on that club crawl, which means it was probably the best 30 bucks I spent last night."
6. "Three-some means: you some, me some, we some."
7. "What happens in Vegas stays on YouTube."

Funny thing: she was wearing five inch heels and I was wearing flats.
We were the same height!

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